Jan

Announcement that there’s a little Lederer on the way . . .

This is a sample of the email that we sent out to announce that we were preggers! It’ll be interesting to see, in 2029, how close my predictions are.

Dear friends and colleagues of Lynn and Norwin Lederer,

After much searching and roaming I’ve decided to pick Lynn and Norwin as my new parents. I’m expected to make my big entrance around the 30^th of June, 2008, but I’m still deciding on whether to be a boy or a girl! If I listen to my Mom and Dad at this early stage of my life they are very indecisive about whether they want a boy or girl, so I guess I’ll just surprise them!

Hanging around here in Mom’s tummy is pretty boring, especially since I can’t see what’s going on in the world around me. However, listening to what’s happening in the outside world, I have come with the following conclusions when I reach 21:

My Dad will be a pensioner at my 21^st birthday party!
Jenna and Barbara Bush (the twin daughters of George Bush) will still be before congress trying to get additional funding for the Iraq War.
Microsoft will have been bought out by Apple, as a result of faltering revenues and yet another Global Antitrust Suit, bringing MS to its knees financially.
Our parents will talk about “cell phones” which are now a thing of the past, since a TransLucentComms Patch (TLCP) – about half the size of a nicotine patch – can be purchased for half the price of a BigMac and pasted behind an earlobe. Then, just by thinking of someone, you can call them! No dialling needed.
A Heads-Up-Display Lens (HUD-L, or Huddle in the local slang) which is similar to a contact lens can be placed over one eye to immediately access, on demand, any movie ever made, and about 5600 global news channels.
Newcastle, in Kwa-Zulu Natal, will be the latest beach holiday destination resort as a result of global warming and the rising of sea levels.
1/3 of the world’s citizens will still be engaged in war and conflict, much like now.
Brent crude will be $365 a barrel.
Water, now relatively scarce, will be $120 a barrel.
The world population will be 11 billion.
A cure for AIDS will have been discovered, but no one can afford it.
The UK will finally submit to using the Euro as well!
The Euro will be the world’s most dominate currency, overtaking the Dollar as the preferred reserve currency.
The second most popular currency used as legal tender in the world will be China’s Yuan Renminbi.

Ok, now for some of the Frequently Asked Questions!

No, I was not planned!
As a result, my Mom and Dad are pretty clueless! They have no idea what they should be doing, buying, etc. Dad was considering buying a new house, but Mom figured 300m² is enough for a family of three!
Yes, Mom and Dad are going to harvest my stem cells.
They are starting to feel excited about this little change in their selfish two-person lifestyle!
Dad has accepted the role of fulfilling all my technological needs and anything with wheels.
Mom will look into my fashion requirements and nutrition.
They don’t know what’s lying ahead of them, and they refuse to buy books on the matter!
Dad has it made, as he’ll sleep through WW3, whereas Mom’s a really light sleeper, so I guess she’ll be up with me at night.
Mom is struggling with the frilly preggie fashions and wonders why there are no preggie clothes for career moms – maybe this is an opportunity.
Yes, Dad has started planning the quickest route to the hospital!
Dad finally has a reason to own station wagon . . .